Daddy's Girl

Look what my Daddy bought me for being a good girl!

Look what my Daddy bought me for being a good girl!

Ohhh these are awesome! Anyone know the source?

Ohhh these are awesome! Anyone know the source?

I hate people

I’m starting to hate people more and more.

Am I just too old to be dealing with irresponsibility and nonsense?

my best friend is my Daddy. This is what my life is lately. Most of the time, I just want to be with Him.

My Dom did this to my hair. I absolutely love it! Opinions?

My Dom did this to my hair. I absolutely love it! Opinions?

30 Day Submissive Challenge- Day 1 (4/10)

Day 1- Does your submission – either what you practice or what you strive for – have a label? Do you view your submission as Taken in Hand, domestic discipline, top/bottom, dominant/submissive, master/slave, owner/pet, or some other description or combination? If you do not use a label, why?

There are so many sides to my submission. I was talking recently to my friend and he stated that I’m part pet, part babygirl, part pain slut, part wifey, and always submissive. I’m never a bottom with Sir. I strive to be a slave, that’s my goal one day and I hope I can achieve it with Daddy (He’s the only person I’ve met who would ever be worthy of the title Master). Daddy usually calls me His subby, His babygirl, His good girl, or His slut.

To call Him Master...

Just had sex with Daddy. Nothing too crazy (quite vanilla for us) but due to an injury this is the first time I’ve felt His cock in me for a while. Afterward He held me in His arms, told how much He loved me, kissed me on the forehead and said “you’ll be my slave in no time”.

Part of the reason it was quite vanilla for us is Daddy might be under the influence of a certain substance. I’m not focusing too much on what He said, if we go into an M/s relationship it won’t be for a while. It’s just nice to know that there’s a part of Him that thinks about, that wants it… that can picture me as His first true slave.

My back after doing wax play for the first time with Daddy. He...

My back after doing wax play for the first time with Daddy. He took the picture. What do you think?

School sucks

I have to study and all I can think about is sucking Daddy’s cock -___-

When Someone You Love is Kink

When Someone You Love is Kink:

Sometimes I wish I could just come out and tell my family about this. Being offered a training collar can be compared to a vanilla engagement, yet to some friends and family my Dom is still just my boyfriend. I wish people understood this intense connection Him and I have. At the end of the day though, we have each other, and that's all that matters.

A History of Kink (in my world)

So since I’m new on tumblr, here’s a bit about me

I'm not the person people picture when they think of kink, fetishism, BDSM. I dress in normal clothes, I have a normal hair color. I'm a college student, a professional in the making. I have kept this side hidden from the world, and for a long time, myself.

I was 6 when I realized I was different. I thought tying up barbies was normal. My parents  felt differently. When they sat me down and asked me about it, that's when I knew something was off. I was fascinated with anything that involved kidnapping, or those old cartoons where the victim is tied to the train tracks. Around 8 I had thoughts of classmates kidnapping, humiliating, torturing me. That's also when I started putting clothespins on my pussy and tits. I would try and fall on the playground. I loved getting hurt. The feeling of the pain, the blood seeping out. I was fascinated with bruises and cuts. Even back then I felt they were beautiful.

Around 11 is when I discovered how good playing with my clit felt. I also had my first rape fantasy then. I remember it clearly. I had this idea of my classmates grabbing me and forcing me to the ground behind the CVS near my house. 12 is when I started tying myself up. My parents discovered me tied up in the basement. One of those awkward situations I couldn't get out of.

When I was 15 I had my first boyfriend. He would kiss me, he would try and turn me on… but I never felt it. He thought something was wrong with him, I thought something was wrong with me. This doesn't feel good, shouldn't it? Then one day the two of us were play fighting and he pinned me down. He must have seen the look in my eyes, I wanted him then. We got further then we ever had that night, but I stopped it. This was wrong! How could this turn me on? I loved him very much, but when I was 17 we broke up.

I was also 17 when I headed off to college. My first year of college was the most critical point of my life. I started seeing this guy that was a few years older than me (21). Jess was a great guy, and he still is. There is so much I owe to him. I viewed one of his online profiles and it listed "D/s" under interests. So naturally I asked what that was. He explained to me that he was a submissive, and what that meant. I was fascinated, I wanted to hear more, I wanted to try! I also liked him and wanted to make him happy, so I agreed to Domme him. I wish I could say I had a clear memory of my first experience, but I don't. I remember it was at his house, and he was essentially topping from the bottom. I remember pulling his hair a little.

I was going to school in the city then, and he was going to school on Long Island, so I mainly Dommed him online. I started getting really into it. Making him go on cam for me, humiliating himself, causing pain. I started to control when and where he could cum. Then he gave me advice: to be a better Domme I needed to submit. I needed to understand what the sub goes through, what this does to them mentally and physically. So I submitted to him. The problem? I was hooked.

Nothing serious ever developed between him and I, mainly because of the circumstances in his life. That did not keep me out of the kink world. I started to talk to more people, I started to explore. However, this is where my story gets complicated…

Spring semester of my first year of college I met someone in class. We started hanging out a lot, became study partners. He would constantly hit on me. I'm not sure how this topic came up, but we were talking about kinks and fetishes, and I explained to him I was getting increasingly interested in BDSM. I wish my memory of how everything happened around this time was clearer, but I think I blocked much out.

The bottom line is without asking if I wanted to try this with him, or even asking if I had any interest in him, while studying in his dorm room one night he turned my fantasy into my nightmare. He raped me.

After this, I went into Domme mode for a while. For the next 6 months I had 3 different subs I would play with. I needed to gain that control back. Eventually as the healing process progressed, my true submissive nature resurfaced. I decided to get back into it and try again. I  ended up in a bad situation once again. I wasn't completely comfortable, and someone started getting too aggressive. He wouldn't let me leave. Nothing happened, eventually he realized I actually was serious, but it triggered too many memories. This was the moment I buried my desires deep inside of me, and that lasted for years.

I spent the next year in a relationship with a guy, 6 months single, and then I started a relationship with another guy… and that's where kink comes in again.

The first year, everything was fine. I was still in denial. The desires slowly started coming back. It started innocently enough… browsing through craigslist one day reading what crazy people were looking for… then I saw an ad for someone looking to make their rape fantasy come to life.

This shouldn't turn me on, right? This is wrong… but it felt so right. I started reading more ads, reading stories, watching videos. The submissive side was back.

I tried to see if I could continue suppressing those desires. It worked for a year… then I realized it wasn't possible. I needed to accept this was a part of me, so I finally decided to bring it up to my boyfriend.

He agreed to pay for my therapy.

He tried once or twice, nothing crazy though. Pinned me down once, called me "bitch" once. Enough to get a reaction out of me, but eventually the two of us stopped being intimate. For many reasons this relationship fell apart. Lack of communication and trust being the main two reasons.

So after the break up I spent some time playing around, exploring my submissive side. Nothing was serious for a while. Had some bad experiences and some good ones. I am grateful for this time. Though I do not think it shaped me in the way past experiences have, it made it more clear who I am and what it is I am looking for.

Finally I did start a relationship with a “Dom” and that was over as soon as it began. Him and I had nothing in common, and the relationship was a mistake looking back… I just agreed because I wanted that stability, that support system. Eventually I found some very dark skeletons in his closet. To be honest, I don't think he was a Dom. He's just a man that got off on abusing women.

So, what happened after that break up….

I wanted to be done with BDSM. How could any man treat me like this? I was frustrated. I was close to running back to my vanilla world and denying all over again, but something happened at the perfect time…

Every Wednesday at the same time I have dinner with a group of my friends, about 15 of us. We were there one day when this woman comes up to us and hands us fliers with a picture of a flogger on it for a "TNG" club.

My friend: "what's TNG"
Woman: "it stands for the next generation"
My friend: "so what exactly is the club all about"
Woman: *insert diplomatic crap about "alternative lifestyles" here*
My friend: "so what does that mean?"
Woman: "it's a fetish club"
My friend: O__O

So she hands us the fliers, and no one really takes them. Well, once she left the room everyone started making jokes.

My other friend: "haha yeah right, I'll take this flier and give it to my roommate, she's such a prude"
Me: "haha omg that would be sooo funny" *takes flier and shoves into bag while no one is looking*

The meeting was for the next day at 7pm, I stared at that flier for way too long. I decided to go up to the floor where the meeting was being held around 6pm, I was going to make a last second decision about whether or not to show up. Around 6:50 I saw one of my friends… and guess where he went? Well, that was it for me. If he's going in, I'm going in.

It was really awkward when he saw me, I tried to ignore it but his face was priceless. I started talking to him about class to keep him distracted from the awkwardness. It turns out quite a few people I knew showed up to that club. Best decision I ever made.

When I went to that first TNG meeting, I did find myself checking out the President of the club a little (remember, this is a school organization, hence the President). Nothing crazy, just a "oh, He's cute" crossed my mind, and that was that. After the meeting most of us went to dinner, He sat near me, so we got to talk a little then.

The next day, I'm at my ex-boyfriends Halloween party. I'm hanging out over near the bathroom catching up with a couple girls… and guess who walked out of the bathroom? It was Him. We spoke the night before about His major, and I mentioned I had friends in that department… apparently we had more mutual friends than we realized. We talked a lot that night, and I think we both felt the connection.

He gave me His number and we continued chatting through there. Do you have any idea how many kink jokes can be made about Pokemon? Let me tell you… there's a lot.

The first time I went to His dorm was Halloween. He showed me all of His toys, it was a bit intimidating. He has this backpack with so much stuff in it… whip, paddle, flogger… I can't even remember most of it. What I do remember is sitting on the bed with Him, He touched my face and told me He felt what we have going on is special, and He'd like to play with me. It was so direct, I couldn't respond. I don't remember what I said, but we hung out more and He made me feel more comfortable.

Finally we were standing and He leaned in and kissed me. The kiss, I remember clearly… the rest of the night, not so much. When I enter "sub mode" I tend to black out in a way. I can remember bits and pieces. I remember Him blindfolding me, I remember how massive His cock is, I remember how good that massive cock felt inside of me.

That night He asked me to be His play partner.

I wrote most of this a long time ago, I just edited it so people can have a brief history. Many things have changed. That club changed my life. I’ve made so many friends who understand this side of me and embrace me for it. I also completely fell in love with the President.

On December 28th, while lying in bed together, He asked me if I would be His sub.

On January 17th, He held me in His arms and told me He loved me.

I’m now also on the e-board of TNG. Most people now know about this side of me, and I couldn’t be happier. For once, I feel as if I’m being true to myself.

All I ever wanted was to give my all to one person, and be loved and cherished in return. My submission brings me strength and power, but I wouldn’t be able to feel such power if I wasn’t submitting to such a worthy Man. I am a lucky sub, and a lucky person.

He’s my Dom, my Sir, my Daddy, my Everything….

…..and this very night, He told me He wants to put a training collar on me.

Daddy did this to me! Isn't His work awesome?

Daddy did this to me! Isn't His work awesome?

a bite mark from Sir

a bite mark from Sir